On September 29 i woke up to the news of suicide of a young man in Haryana. One among several such news stories of men abuse that i have been waking up to in last some years. I usually find these stories only in regional newspapers as this rarely makes a national headline or a breaking news. Today let’s talk the forgotten gender -Men.
Aman Baisla case
I inquired about the case and got to know. A 22 year old Delhi based business man energetic , living his life happily took his own life. In a 35 minutes video on Facebook. Aman shared how he was tortured , blackmailed and threatened by a woman working with him. This woman demanded some money . She threatened him that if he’ll not pay her amount she’ll file a false rape case against him. He also mentioned when Shushant Singh Rajput isn’t getting Justice how would i get it?
Few days later he committed suicide. You might not know Aman is one of several men in India who are killing themselves. Because of fake allegations of dowry to settle these cases. These false cases leave no option but a suicide note to reclaim their innocence.
If this was a woman , this would probably be in headlines all over the country and would be a molestation case. But unnatural death of Men are not recognized under the law and thus we don’t have statistics.
Amity Gang rape case
On june 2012 news of Amity gang rape case broke in Delhi. Prashant and Milind accused of gang raping their own friend. They were sent to jail for 14 months and underwent a criminal trial for two and half years despite every proof of innocence. Their bail was constantly denied perhaps because at that time India was under the influence of Nirbhaya gang rape. Innocence didn’t Matter if you are a man and accused. No actions are taken against false accuse in this case or in several cases in India that are happening today.
Whenever a woman is abused everyone say what if she was your mother , what if she was your sister. But what about men abuse? Today i wanna ask you what if Aman was your brother. And you saw him dying everyday and eventually dead. Even he was not at mistake.
Laws have been made for protection of women and it should be. What about the laws that serve as a deterrent so these laws are not misused. Justice should be served to women but what about the justice to those who are implicated in false case. Their lives ruined, their career lost, their self respect dignity shattered. Asking money for Dowry is wrong but is asking money for filling a wrong case right?
A lot of people will misunderstand me as i am talking against women but i am not i am talking against injustice.
Gender equality a myth
In times when we are talking about gender equality. In times when we are talking about laws that should be made for everybody. Though i am a woman and i connect with pain of women but i also connect with pain of men. A gender that’s not supposed to cry. A gender which is not supposed to share their suffering.
I choose to talk about men abuse because when we are talking about laws, talking about equality, our Constitution says that nobody should be discriminated on basis of cast , gender, religion . We have laws of domestic violence where women can seek protection against physical, mental, emotional or sexual abuse but a man can’t. But we have very few or no laws against men abuse. We have laws of adultery that immunes a married women from any criminal prosecution so her husband can’t do anything in that situation. All a married man can do today is file a case of divorce on grounds of cruelty . Even when he does that he can get several cases on him and turn from victim to perpetrator. We have law for rape, sexual harassment at workplace but these laws don’t considered men as victim.
If a man break up from a relationship a woman can file a case against him. But when a women break up man is told just to move on.
We have several government helplines for women but none for men. So, what’s happening these days the men who are in distress end up calling women helplines. And they don’t have any support for them. Several reports shows 24% of calls on women helplines are from men. The only private helpline SIFF for men gets thousands of calls every month . All that counselors can do is to provide emotional support because their ain’t any laws. Their Ain’t any protection
Everyone knows about this injustice but no one talks about it. Men has become a forgotten gender. So i decided to write this article to make you aware men too need protection.
Just like you don’t need to woman to fight for women. You don’t need to be man to fight for men.
A lot of men in past and today have taken stand for injustice of women. But now let’s take a stand for injustice of men .
Do read my previous blog https://unbridlemusing.com/315-2mentel-health